Running to the Lord.

No way to handle things who made me so sad
Mama the weeping
Mama the Angel
No sleep in Heaven
Or Bethelahem
Some pray that one day
Christ will come a calling
They light a candle
And hope that glows
And some just lie there crying
For Him to come and find them
But when he comes, they don't know how to go.....

I'm going somewhere next week. Somewhere I haven't been in so long.
God knows I need this....

Drinking game (to be saved for later when I actually drink. Or I may just use soda instead)

Sorry this is coming to you so late. I almost forgot about this entirely. Yikes! But without further ado I present my:
Dead Like Me Drinking Game
(This game could use addition/revision later on for improvement)
This is a game that requires lots of different alcohols, but is sure to be a lot of fun at your next Dead Like Me viewing party.
The game begins with everyone choosing their favorite reaper as their character. Choose between George, Daisy, Mason, Roxy, or Rube. Next everyone takes a bet on how they think the victim(s) of the episode will die (try to keep these vague such as shot, hit be an object, fall off something, etc.). Now with the characters chosen and the bets made mix the following drinks and pour the following shots, and distribute them according to the contestants chosen characters:
For George:
Drink: White Russian (Vodka, Coffee liqueur, Light cream)
Shot: Vodka
For Daisy:
Drink: Blazing Fire (Ice, Vodka, Gin, Light rum, Triple sec, Pineapple juice, Grenadine)
Shot: Tequila
For Mason:
Drink: Screwdriver (Orange Juice, Lots of Vodka)
Shot: Whiskey
For Roxy:
Drink: Green Scorpion aka The Jealous Bitch (Jack Daniels, Vodka, Blue Curacao, 7-Up, Ice)
Shot: Jack Daniels
For Rube:
Drink: Mystery Beverage (have a friend mix 3 assorted shots of liquor into your favorite fruit juice or soda. [note: you dont get to decide which liquors go in the drink])
Shot: Gin
Put this aside and don't touch them till the end of the game. Now grab an additional drink of anything you want (beer, wine, mixed drinks, hard liquor - keep it alcoholic!) and start the episode.
Character drinking:
If your character does one of the following actions at any point through the episode, take a drink of your beverage:
George:
says something incredibly cynical
Daisy:
reference having a sexual encounter with a movie star
Mason:
comes up with a clever scheme or con job
Roxy:
threatens to physically harm someone
Rube:
uses metaphor to explain something
Combos:
In certain circumstances two people can drink at once if the following action happens during their interaction:
George/Rube: Rube calls George “peanut”
Roxy/Mason: Roxy threatens/attempt to kill Mason
Mason/Daisy: Mason hits on Daisy
Ending:
Now with the episode ending the winners and losers of the bet should be determined.
If you're one of the winner: Take the shot. This shot represents your character.
If you're the loser: You have to do the shot and the finish the drink! The drink represents the way in which your character died! Make sure YOU don't die from alcohol poisoning

Yeah.
Christmas.
I'm no Christian.
But I love giving people presents.
Not gonna lie.

Addicted.

You know what? I am.

Lately I just feel....depressed. Every moment of every day, another negative thought enters my mind and it hits me hard. I feel like I'm drifting away on a raft, and though I appear quiet, I'm screaming for someone. Someone to come over to me and help.

Someone...someone who never will.

Din Din Wo.

Life right now is okay. Earlier today (which I mean like 40 minutes ago) I flipped out. I just felt like I couldn't breathe or something. It wasn't because of what you think it is. It was because of him. Oh yes, that's right. Now I think maybe it was a panic attack or something. Only I'm not Byron Bluth. Ah. I ka barra....I ka barra. I love this music. Its lulling me into a state of mind. So perfect...

Well I'm babysitting so I suppose I should probably go.

I WISH I HAD PLANS FOR A FRIDAY NOIGHT. But I don't. Oh well.

Whatever, THERE'S BOSTON TOMORROW.

Until later

Nobody else gives me this thrill.

It had to be you.
Wonderful you.

it is you.


So I have my old coputer all hooked up. And I think the new one is here, just
not quite ready to be put together.

I'm totally exhausted
I need to go to bed if I'm to wake up in time to go the the Stroll tomorrow
<3

Peace.
Love.
Life.
Prosperity.
Lynn.
Blakely.

Liar. Liar.

Happy Black Friday!

my favorite holiday ever. I've been up since 2 and I've been to a shit load of stores already. I may go to the mall later (if I'm allowed).

But now I was going to...but NOW I think I may just stay home and fucking sulk. GUESS WHO MADE A SUPRISE VISIT?

You guessed it. He's at Eric's house. I'm afraid to fucking go out. Why didn't anybody tell me?

Deliever Us

Call me.

Both of you.


I love you <3

Why am I mad?!

By the way Blogger


I'M ROYALLY PISSED OFF.
Want to know why? Do ya? Do ya? Do ya? Do ya? HUH HUH HUH!?!??! Alright, well anyways I'm so fucking mad because of last night. There I was, comfortable, surreal, trying to unravel after screaming children and tons of homework. its like, 11 o clock. Right? You can picture it. I'm comfortable. And all of a sudden...I scream. I scream loud. That motherfucking KEVIN and BROOKE of all fucking people had to beat LANCE AND LACEY. AND NOT EVEN MENTIONING WARREN AND KIM TOTALLY SHOULD'VE KICKED ASS. I was so mad. Because I knew that like, Brook was going to win. But I had SOME hope that my boy Lance or Warren would pull through for me. But you know what? I was wrong. Fuck Brooke. I wanted either Queen Frostalocks or Footy to win.

So I'm pissed off, especially at Carrie-Ann. She was like "OMG I LOVE YOU GUISEEEEE" and then Bruno, who I think is one of the funniest kids ever, lost major points with me. I remember the time where Bruno was shaking his hips, trying to teach us and everyone else out there how to properly shake the shit.

THEN CLORIS. Oh god CLORIS. My hero. I love her to d e a t h! She's all like "LAWL I'M OLDER DEN ALL U ND I HAS BIG BOOBIES" Which I don't remember her having...Ah well.

Then you have fucking Jeffrey. That fucking prick was poking fun at everyone. I was like O_______________________O. It was quite disturbing. You have no idea. He was crazy. But of course he didn't make fun of Kym (not KIM, I like her, but KYM the whore. You know the one who sucks) and god bless Rocco. I missed him, even if sucks. But he did improve. Cheryl was doing well too. I think its because there was no pressure what so ever. Except when Len looked high. What a weirdo eh? Fucking Brits. xD

So there you go. Kevin who totally needs to be manscaped and Brooke who needs to go take care of her children, won. They won in the end. Like what...the....fuck?

SOMEBODY PLEASE OH PLEASE HELP ME OUT HERE
I'M DEPRESSED.

Your own imaginations will tell you exactly what you want to hear!

I'm pumped for this week. Tomorrow is the pep rally. Which will be spent (for me at least) praying that Topham or Sullivan will get a pie smashed into their face. Muwahaha. How fun for me. Indeed. Then after the halfday, Molly is coming over and we're going to watch movies and cook. Sounds like a typical day for us. Then for Thanksgiving, Molly is coming over for dinner and to chill with me. Than on FRIDAY its my all time favorite holiday: BLACK FRIDAY. I get to wake up at 2 am and try to kill soccer moms for cheap toys and inexpensive electronics. I looooove the holidays, I mean like fuck jesus but I'm down with the shopping and the carols and-




SPEAKING OF CAROLS THE HOLIDAY CONCERT IS GONNNA BLOW CAUSE NOONE KNOWS WHAT THE FUCK THEY'RE DOING

Oom-pah pah.....

Doing drugs on a dashboard

Today my doctor called and said I had elevated pitutary gland excretions (I forget the name). She said one of the reasons this could be is because I could be hypo-thyroid. I know, sounds like improper English, buts its not. What that means is my thyroid isn't working very well at all, meaning its not metabolising ANYTHING I put into my system. Which couldbe why I gained so much week from last year. But she said she's still not sure, and she's doing more tests.

So I'm going to an endocrinologist on the 4th of December. I'm so excited for change. I know what the lap band does, it doesn't make you lose weight, you have to do that, but it dramatically helps. The way I see it is if Mr. Piepora can do it, so can I....Right?

I don't know if its cloudy or bright.

So...
So oh so...
My day started off fucking horrible.

It just did. That might have been the last thing I wanted to hear. I don't give a flying fuck about Sean Waple's status on MY life. Or if he thinks I'm a bitch. I don't care. You don't do someone's gym work so then they'll whore themselves out. Sorry, but life doesn't work that way.


*sigh*

BUT THEN
OH GAWD

FELICIA RAN UP TO ME
OH GOD!!!
AND THEN SHE SAID THAT LEA OFFICIALLY HATES HIM!>>!>!.
AS'FJASDJKFSGHDKLFSHDFJKSGDJ BVSDJKFGBSKVSDGHFWERIFYSDKFHASJKFHKLFH1234128937GF3HIFBSDKJAFHJKKSDJAFHKLSFNXCKVMBNSDKHDJKSFHASDKLFH

Sorry, my fingers were spasming.

But yes, his numbers weaken everyday. Finally, after a year....people are listening. I realized something. I am so loud. BUT I am so quiet. I throw everything out there, but I'm subtle. It depends how close you are to me. If you're close enough, you'll understand what I'm going through and pick up on it. Otherwise, I'm getting better at hiding things from myself. Ah.

I love the blog titles I choose. It makes me feel cool. Even though I'm obviously not. NAHHHHHT.

My fingers hurt so bad and I am unsure why.

I need sleep but I don't want to.

Ah well...Anne came home early, so I have to.


Peace bitches.

Look at the mess we made tonight.

So last night, I don't quite remember what the fuck happend. I kept waking up over and over. I attempted to have a lucid dream, it didn't really work out for me. It was a pretty hardcore epic fail. But whatever, I'll keep trying. It has to work.

This is how the beat goes. Just let your body go.

So today is going to be rather busy. I have Geometry, HR, Gym, Algebra, and Chemistry. Oh yes. Then after school I'm going to Melrose Wakefield to get an xray/CAT scan of my tonsils. They're probably going to take them out soon because of how huge they are and how huge I am. That equals deathdeathdeathdeath.

I suppose I'll be here after, per usual

Lots O Love <3
Lynnie

I don't care what you say...

I'm so fed up and done with the human race. Honestly...we're so overrated. I'd much rather be an animal. Even though I may not be able to think for myself, at least I'd have the fucking instinct to tell me right from wrong. I'd know what to do. No emotion. Sometimes that's what I want to be....an emotionless vacant-minded being. One who cares not what others think, feel, do, say, or act upon.



Even the prettiest rose has its thorns

But does that mean that the ugliest has few to none?



We all act upon impulses, sure. But to know the extreme some people can take it to. I know that "Everything happens for a reason" but day by day, I'm getting more depressed. Sure, people are allowed to be where they want and act how they want.



Sometimes its easier to keep quiet

Rot from the inside out.

Rather than have more people attack you

With questions, comments, concerns.

All I can do is throw on a smile

Attempting to cast a shadow over my weariness.



But why is it the innocent must suffer while the evil creatures get away with it. Life is no longer a fairytale. People are people. They can hurt you over...and over....and over....and over. Even if they aren't around.



The apologies are all around me

Suddenly, they are like flies and I honey.

So as I get eaten away, bit by bit

Will anything be left in the bitter end?

Shitty poem.

Watch the red river flow
Shaking...its ever so cold here.
Here in the vast lands of your lies.
I watch us all walk around.
Each enveloped in our own issues.
But it all points back to you.
We each got our turn
And we each got our own loss.
Some worse than others.
But its damn sure that they were all mistakes.
Because here we lie, oh so effortless.
Wishing we could go back into time.

This is how the beat goes.

So today went relatively smoothly. No big drama, no tears, and it was okay. I'm happy with the result of the Captain Dickhead Jr. case. Sean is going to die tomorrow, just throwing it out there. Ben is gonna kick the shit out of him. Which, I think is going to be entertaining. I'm proud of Ben for sticking up for him AND for Katie. Although Katie did cause half of the issue, I think I'm more pissed at Sean for instigating such a thing. You know? Its like not only are you whoring yourself out WHEN you have a boyfriend...but for a fucking gym assignment? Ai ai ai....makes me wanna scream. So this morning was good because Kaitlyn didn't truly beat anyone up, just jumped into their faces and screamed. It was productive. I told Sean that Ben was going to kill him tomorrow and that he best watch his back.

1st period today was really fun because Maruzzi was ABSENTTTT and then Nan was our sub for half the class. So she was talking about instigating a new film class for women. I think I'd like to take it next year. You prettty much would watch movies like FRIED GREEN TOMATOES. Or STEEL MAGNOLIAS. Which are two of my fav movies EVER.

I want to gorent the Red Violin.

BUT FOR NOW I HAVE TO GO CAUSE IM ON THE PHONEWITH MAH BABY

XOXOXOXOOXOXOX

Lynneh

Catastrophe

You did nothing.
neither of you did
I just want to make you both happy.


I wish I shut my fucking mouth more often.
So so so sos ososososososos sorry
For both of you

Hear where I stand at the turning of the years/

I am a fuck up.

Strawberry Fields Forever

I feel so fucking guilty for everything. I am so so so so so so so sossosososossosososoossoososos sorry. Its not my place to tell anything to anyone, I'll let you do that. I feel guilty for the past year....for the past hour. You would be a patron saint if you could forgive me. I want things to be alright, but letting yourself simply unload on blogs and what not is not enough.

I'm begging you to be honest. With yourself and the world. I love you. And I wish I could act like nothing happend, but to be honest? Its impossible. Nobody is mad or uncomfortable. I promise you.

The best is yet to come and babe won't it be fine.

Doug and Molly just left my house. And let me tell you, I can't remember a better time in my life. We were watching Moulin Rouge and just having a blast. Doug and I kissed so passionatley time and time again it was insane. I felt that instant of passion, that small glimpse into the future. And believe me when I say that it was a wonderful view. I love him so fucking much.

I do feel guilty now though. I love you both and I'm sorry that I was doing what I was doing.

Peace out so I can call my baby boy :D

Blue blooded girls of independent needs.

How generous can a person be? The answer is alot. How generous can I be? The answer is too much. I want everything to work out, I truly do. And I know nobody is asking for me to giftwrap something and throw it at them. But you know what? That is how I feel. Life right now isn't going well. I want to lie and say "EVERYTHING'S FINE AND NORMAL AND NOTHING HAS FUCKING CHANGED". But I cannot do that. I'm sorry. I want to find a solution to this problem. And I feel as though I cannot find a solution until everything is honest in the world.

But that won't happen will it?

I love people too much to see this happen. Honestly. You know who you are, even if you don't read this....you know how deeply I care for you. Its ridiculous how much I love you. I cannot watch you make yourself suffer. Okay? You have got to know that. I watch you and it scares me because there is something wrong with you. Someone who I would take a bullet for. Someone who I would do anything for.

I say I'd do anything....but why am I having so much trouble doing this? And yes, honesty is indeed the best policy.....especially when it comes to this. I want you to know that nobody is mad and everyone loves you. But I feel that you need to be honest with people. I do. I know that emotions are running high and you've been bottling them for months and months. I'm proud to know that you're allowing yourself emotions to get out there in the open. I'm proud to have you as a best friend.

I need to go shower. I doubt I will...I might just sit here and cry a bit.

I love you both so much...

Down by the river on a Friday night.

Wow. Wow wow wow wow.
I'm tired.

So my aunt brought her boyfriend over today. He seems pretty cool. Wicked smart looking guy and he's really friendly. He looked kinda like Doug so it kinda creeped me out in a way. His name was Mike or something like it.

Today, I've been to a shitload of stores that include: Stop and shop, shaws, target, home depot, starbucks, kmart, babies r us, iparty, and like 10 others. I'm really excited for next weekend because we're having a baby shower for Jessica; my uncle Paul's girlfriend. She's a nice kid. She's going to name the baby Lilianna, which I don't really like, so I'm going to call the baby Lily. The party is going to be at my house with all the females on my side of the family, and a bunch of her family members. Me and Jen literally had 27 heartattacks a piece shopping for the baby clothes. Oh....my....god. They were all so cute! AND SO LITTLE! I cannot wait to have babies that I can shop for. (LAWL 3-4). We bought like 10 outfits, a bassinet that plays soft music and rocks itself, organic diapers, and recieving blankets. Plus we're throwing the party, so its all cool.

What else happend today....Oh yes, I got in a fight with Doug. But I'm over it. I really am. I realized that I love him far too much to allow things to come between us like that. Y'know, stupid little petty things. (I still love you most)


AND I TOTALLY JUST LOST THE GAME.

I've been missing Joanie alot more now that Captain Asshole is coming back. I definitely want her back to talk to her and everything, but I know that she has to get better first. GSA isn't quite the same without her. Everyone at Saugus High loves her and misses her LOTS. Speaking of GSA, I am highly anticipating the family sponsorship this Holiday Season. We are also thinking about doing a muder-mystery night, since the Drama Club abandoned that concept.

Peace out for now!

Sometimes I wake up crying

I am so fucking sorry. I really am. But you need to understand why she's so mad. And why she "hates" you. Its because of last year. Its not my fault and yes, she is spazzing, but she's doing her job as my mother. She's scared for me Doug, and yeah, she's allowed to be. Does it mean I don't love you or I'm losing interest? No. No No no no no no and NO. It means nothing of the sort. I love you so much, you'll never know. I wish you didn't have nightmares, but its not reality. It isn't. In fact, its quite the opposite. I know things are going bad right now, and you can leave me if you want. But I love you and its going to stay that way.

I'm sorry.

Its like a river that's so wide, it swallows you whole.

I am so tired. So so so tired. Not physically, but emotionally. I just feel like i'm caving in, from the inside to the out. I'm sure whoever reads this knows that Captain Asshole is coming back. Oh yes. Coming back December 26th. I feel so nauseously ill. Nobody even wants him back. Except his precious Lea. And you know what? Fuck them both.

Last night was a lot of fun. Me and Molly chilled, toook sexalicious pictures.

But now I have to go find them sexalicious pictures.

I SHOWED MOLLY MY FAVROTIE MOOOOOOVIE! Fried Green Tomatoes. It was amazing

You'll be dumb with wonderment

Today should be interesting. I slept very little last night because I kept having strange dreams that include btu are not limited to: Being a drag queen, being in a musical, being a man who was dressed as a woman pretending to be a man, pegging people, and penguins.

Spectacular Spectacular has been stuck in my head all night as well.

Seeing spiders, I'm told they never lie.

The sudden urge to vomit is all over me. What oh what is becoming of me? I want only happiness for everyone around me. Including myself. But what happens when you reach a point where its dog eats dog? And then you look back and say "Fuck my life." What the hell do you do? Please tell me. Its not as simple as it seems. Nothing is as simple as it seems. I know what I need to do but I'm so goddamn immature I cannot do a thing about it.

-Lynn's future play. It may or may not contain chronicles for the oh so sweet life of a tired girl.

Breathing just passes the time.

I love the smell of autumn.
Does anyone else?


I realized something about myself last night. I am the biggest bitch, but if I truly actually care about you, there is NOTHING you can do to piss me off. Honestly. This is really fucking weird of me.

I'm so ready to become a pretty-son-of-a-bitch. I'm also excited for today and the events that shall occur ;).

And I'm sorry universe. How could I be so blind? It makes my heart ache and quake to know that things seem to slip right through the tips of my fingers. Oh please, find a way to forgive me.

I love you all. Peace, luck, and good fortune


LAWL ANYONE ELSE PUMPED ABOUT GOING TO SHS AND THEN GETTING BOMBARDED WITH WORK AND POSSIBLE BOMBS?!??! LYNN BLAKE IS TOTALLY naht.

I'm hoping this years lockdown I can get stuck with people who aren't complete jackasses. Last year, I was locked in the middle of Joany's office with Captain Asshole and Nicoleiooioioioioi.'


eye g2g 2 skol luv u al cuz ur ma homiegz!

Take a sip of this smoky atmosphere

So I suddenly feel sexy because I uploaded a LOT of new pictures to myspace
And you know what?

I LOOK AMAZING IN EVERY SINGLE ONE


Suck one that, Ms. Media!

Yeah thats right, plus girls can be sexier than you with your ribs and your tiny tits!

Please believe me when I say I love you.

So today was pretty good. I woke up about 5 oclock and saw my door was open. I got up out of bed, turned off my light and closed the door. This happend repeatedly throughout the night. I asked my mom today and she was like "I honestly didn't do anything". And then I've beent thinking about the flashes of white that I see sometimes. Not to mention the lights turning on and off AND the bathroom door closing by itself with no wind. Its starting to confirm my belief that my house has paranormal activity. I mean, I don't know that for sure, but it would make sense. My grandmother died here almost 4 years ago and I think that maybe she's coming to me. Sometimes when I get really upset, I'll sob over and over and beg God to send her back. Literally, me, 3 am, sobbing, begging for her to come back to me. I wonder now if someone is listening to me...that would be something new.

Last night I also had a weird dream that it WAS my nana and I was able to communicate with her. I honestly hope this dream comes true.

So I was going to chill with Molly today, but my phone is retarded and dies every 4 hours, so I never got her text messages :(. But my oldest and favorite cousin, Michelle, came over to see us, and we went to get manicures and went shopping. We saw my uncle's very-pregnant girlfriend and she looked....high. It was weird.

I'm now drinking a Dr. Pepper and singing "Bleeding Love".

Hey lovebug, I love you forever and I know how you are. I know you love clingyness. And y'know what? I'm starting. I promise.

So tomorrow I'll have late day, chorus, and then I'll be going to either the mall or my house with Molly dear.


"DAMN GURL U HUGE!"

Which reminds me, soon I'm going to an endocrinologist. I'm changing myself. I have to. I know you all think I'm sexy, but I hate myself. I do. This is for me. I want to live a good, long, HEALTHY life, and I cannot do it in my current state.

Peace out loves <3

But time cannot take what comes free.

I'm physically exhausted. My birthday went really reallly really well, nobody killed anyone or anything. It was stressless. Then Molly slept over and kept me up till 4ish xDDDDD. I didn't think it was funny then. I was sobbing, I have no idea why, but I was.

Yesterday I was running all over the place and was home till one and then got home at 8ish.

So I'm going to school, getting dismissed, and going to the doctors.

Peace out.

I hold my breath and count to ten.

So its my birthday. I honestly don't feel that good right now. I have so much shit going on that I feel like exploding. Hardcore right? So today we're going out to dinner at one of my favorite resturants and we will chill. Then I think me, my family, and Molly are going back to Liz's because my mom is gonna partay. LAWL JK. I want today to be a good day. Nothing shitty, just nice times all day. But again, never going to happen. I'm giving Doug and Molly both time to sleep and possibly calm down. So I'm calling them around 1.

I need to go get my eyebrows done soon, I need to shower, and pick out an outfit.

Gifts recieved
1. My locket <33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333
2. Journal
3. Perks of Being A Wallflower
4. Sock Monkey
5. Gift card
6. 1001 things teens need to know before leaving the house xDD
7. Love and wishes from all of my friends.

g2g

Love you all

And this is my first post as a 15 year old :)

So naturally we have more natural disasters.

So, exactly a half hour till I'm 15.
Thats cool.
It would be cooler if my boyfriend wasn't miserable.
I want to call him but he def needs his sleep.
To chill
Y'know?


So me and molly went to the movies and the btich was like "UHM I NED 2 C N ID PLZ" so Lynn was like "o_O, lets go see Madagascar" And you know what? it was actually a really good movie. Made Lynn and Molly piss themselves laughing and cry sad tears.
It was beautiful!!!

My eyes hurt from being awake all day. I need to sleep for tomorrow. The big day right? I like my wine how I like my women, locked in a basement for 24 years. Wow I'm totally going to hell. But I think I'll go to the cool part of hell, where its a dry heat, there are strippers, gambling, and of course; My friends! AND HOOTERS AND STARBUCKS AND SARAH PA- lawl I mean JESUS!

Sarah Palin
switch the two first letters and you get a reallly stupid sport.
Stupid sport = stupid politician?


LOL I LOST THE GAME.

We got older, but we're still young.

I wonder why I never have anything significant to say at GSA. I've realized its because I do all my rants here.

Does anyone else notice how often I start sentences off with "So". I wonder why. I say like alot to, but nobody actually types the word like. IF they do, then they're just stupid. But anyways, onto todays blog. So today I got to school, kicked Sean Waple, than proceeded to find Doug. Well he found me, but its not like I was hiding. He gave me my birthday present, which is the cutest thing ever. Its a silver locket, shaped like a heart with our initials engraved on it, along with the date we started dating. It adorable and made me wanna cry.

As for tomorrow? Definitely not excited. Why? My boyfriend isn't going to the party and I want him to. I'm honestly miserable. Obviously there is no easy way out, but of course I had to block the easier option with my big fucking mouth. I cannot shut my fucking face.


Yeah. Guess who's done with bullshit? LYNN IS

:D

Yeah. So work was somewhat normal today, you know except for me crying to Liz about my issues. It was really awkward but she was asking me why I was upset and what not, so I told her. She really does feel bad for me I think. But as my mom's friend, she HAS to side with my mom. That's only fair to my mom and her.

But as of now I think I'm going to call Doug and see if I convince him to come. We shall see.

Your warmth is crashing down on me.

Holy jesus.
So today right? BSO was absolutley 10000000000000000% incredible. I chilled with Joe most of the time because it was me, him, Anthony, Liz, and Sam who were like...people I didn't want to stab in the throat. Oh! And Fudgie and Ben. They were okay but we didn't chill alot cause they were with Lea alot. And I wasn't dealing with Lea today. I've heard enough about how Captain Asshole is doing down in Hicksville. Which is a prime convo whenever I'm around. So stab me?
But that is off topic indeed. Indeed. So we were sitting really close to stage, like the third row. So we're just chilling, and this woman walks from like the soprano section, over next to the tenor soloist. And before she sings, the first thing I say is "Holy shit look at that ass" Joe turned and was like O_O. It was cool. OH YEAH! She had a nice voice (just kidding, it was too high for my taste but of course it was beautiful) Overall however, my favorite parts were the solos for the Baritone (he was incredible. What an amazing voice eh?) and the Fortuna part. It was really fun. Than Mickey Dee's was pretty fun with everyone.

So then after school was GSA and I think everyone is doing good. Except people don't want to sell bracelets like....ever. And it definitley pisses me off in a big way because if you're going to be in a group, you need to commit to it. Grrr motherfuckers.

2 days till my birthday? Lynn is pumped. Not really. But what are you gonna do? NOTHING. That's right.

Dentist tomorrow? Yeah that sucks.

Well its almost bed time....Noight noight.

Here I am couting down the days.

I hate life.
End of story?


Honestly I can feel the ground shaking and crumbling beneath my feet but I just want to keep ignoring it. You'd think I'd know better.

I love him. I do. <3 I know he's mad at me but what can I do? Nobody is happy with me

I'll be back after BSO. Which I think is now gonna suck because neither of my best friends will be there.

I love you Doug

Realize.

Barack Obama is officially the first African American to become president.

I couldn't be any happier! Because this is a sign of change. A sign where people from all over the world just got a little closer. We have defeated a section of hate. This ongoing battle that seems never-ending, but we can try to take down the hate.

I am proud to say that I was alive when the first African American president was elected, and I supported him. And I will be proud when a gay man becomes president, when a woman, when an asian, when a latino, when a transgender. I am ready for change, and I'm going to help in every way possible.

As far as the questions go, I'm somewhat satisfied. Question 1 was obviously denied. But that's obvious. Why lower state tax when its going to triple property tax AND probably not do good in the long run. Question 2 was ridiculous from the start, and I'm somewhat disapointed that it passed. Question 3 I am very happy about, and I would love to adopt one of the greyhounds.

But I have to go. Jack is excited about Obama and now wants to play Zoo Tycoon!

No wai guise

OH
By the way
I asked Jack how to spell president
and he goes
O
B
A
M
A
:D


THOGUHT YOU'D FIND IT AMUSING

Playing Favorites.

Its election day and I feel happy all of a sudden. Believe me all day I have been MISERABLE. Not as though I have an interesting reason. Same old Lynn shit.

But there is HOPE. Obama is kicking McCain's ass. And lemme say, its amazing.

So I've been thinking about my family and how much they suck. Not my immediate family, but my grandmother's nieces, nephews, and siblings. Most of them are evil people. Like one branch of them is already battling one another for my aunt's estate. Its unfair because I loved her more than they did. She reminded me of me. She was generous and lived a short life with really no purpose other than to serve the greater good. Never married, but had so many experinces as a child. Doesn't that sound like me?

Recently my mom cleaned out my grandmother and grandfather's old closet. I found so many pictures, documents, and I found a Bible. A bible thats about as big as my stomach. Its huge. I finally got to meet my uncle Bibby, who in 1940, made Boston Globe headlines for violently murdering his mother and her friend at a tea party. He was declared the "Demented Dwarf". Demented or not, he looks alot like the other males in my family. Its comforting in a way. To know that I'm not the only one who is totally fucked up. I'm actually contemplating reading the Bible. Is that weird? Not for nothing, I want faith. I need it.

Can you feel really good and really bad about something at the same time? Like...extremely conflicted? Honestly, its my mood. I need a word for that. Stronger than confused. More like...LYNNIFIED.

I read "My Sister's Keeper" today and I sobbed so much. What a brilliantly written novel that was. I want to write something just as brilliant. My problem is that I'd be better at writing screen plays or actual plays. Not books. I am way to visual when I write.

I cannot wait until get contacts and get these hidious glasses off my face. Not to mention my doctor's appointment coming up. I am more excited for that than anything else. I can't tell you why, not until I know for sure ;). Not going to get my hopes up and then have them crashing down on me. You know? No way I'm letting this one out. Only one person knows and she knows why I told her.

GOD NOW I'M EXCITED.

I think I have the weirdest bloge entries. I honestly don't give a shit if anyone reads it. Like when I write in my journal, I felt like someone was gonna be reading it so I never let it all out. Here, I know only 2 people really read it. (UNless you're a cool stalker person xD jk)

I've also been playing Zoo Tycoon. And its fun. Fun fun fun fun!

AH! I have an English test tomorrow?!?!? Someone shoot me!?!?!?!?

I hate Wednesdays. Stuck in Agola's for 90 minutes, than off to my OTHER language class for 90 minutes, THEN I HAVE MATH (EW), then I have History. Which sucks 100 percent on double period days because Donahue fucking talks and talks and never shuts up. So you can attempt to get him to talk about the pats or the election, but it never lasts.

Hay guise? Know what I realized?
Molly posts like 30 short blogs a day, I post 1 loooong one eeryday, and Doug posts one when he's stressed or wants to tell us uber cool stories. Its cool how we all have our own styles. Shows how opposites attract! :o!

Thursday is field trip day!!! BSO is gonna be the shit. I think I'll chill with Joe Dick-mauro, Lizzzzzz, Sammi, and Anthony the whole time SEEING AS MY TWO BIFFLES AREN'T GOING! -mad face-

TOMORROW. I'm chilling with Molly and possibly having an Obama party.

I'm reobsessing with The Starting Line. I had semi-good taste in my gothic/emo/punk phase. You know, when cutting was cool (never really was) and hottopic was the shit (still is)

BUT NOW I'M TIRED.

Noight!

Beauty In The Breakdown.

Has anybody realized how cold it is? Right now, as I type, my fingers and toes are numb and I cannot function. You'd think I'd have toughened up by now, seeing as I've lived in New England my whole life. But this is was colder than I remember last year. Maybe because last year we got like 2 inches of snow throughout the entire winter. This winter is supposed to suck.

I do not want to go to school today simply because I know how cold its going to be and I've yet to buy a new winter coat yet. I also don't want to go to school because I'd like to stay home, protest McCain, and eat soup.

So tomorrow is ELECTION DAY! Duh-duh-DUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!
I am quite confident in an Obama win, but I also thought that with Kerry and we got stuck with Bush...AGAIN.

I'm wearing my VOTE DEMOCRAT sticker to school. I know someone will say something, but its only fair right? FREEDOM TO BE A PRICK!

My birthday is less than a week away. Honestly, I'm really excited. Not only is it my birthday, my 8th month with the nicest kid in the fucking world, but its my first time EVER having someone sleep over my house. And since its Molly, that just makes everything so much better. Over the summer when Molly came to Maine with me and my mom was going insane because we couldn't shut up. Legit cackling in a trailer at 3 ocock in the morning. So now that no one can tell us to stfu, I have a feeling we'll be a wake all night, gossiping, laughing, and being teenage girls.

I'm having a bad hair day. My hair is practically frozen and its gross. Not like that matters but hey...it's my blog so stfu.

I'm so ready for Joanie to come back to SHS. Seriously, I miss her so much. I hope she feels better!

I want to be done with being serious for awhile. Everyone's always telling me to be a kid while I got the chance. But what if you have the chance but would rather be an adult because you don't know HOW to act your age? What if you have too much responsiblities to act like yourself?

Answer me.

Cheek to cheek.

Just got home from the mall.
I'm quite convinced that I suck? I want to say I'm sorry Doug.
I'm sorry for messing up and making you jealous again. I never meant to do anything I swear. I'm sorry I yellled but I just cannot take this "moral enemy" thing you and my mother have going on. I'm sorry I was texting other people but I felt awkward because I thought you were pissed off at me. I love you and you know that.

I don't want anything to ever happen to you.
Just remember that.

I love you.

Lasting Impressions.

So...its the first of november. And already I dislike the month.
Last night I got in a huuuuuuuuuge fight with my mom over the party. Apparently she thought it was at Lea's house and now I can't go because its at Eric's. I'm really pissed that she won't let me go because I should be able to decide for myself if I'm ready to or not. But at the same time I'm really glad she wouldn't let me go because I know I couldn't handle it.

I'm also pissed because my fucking braces are broken. Ugh its hurts and I don't have the wax stuff to put on it. Today was my parents 19th anniversary. Whoopee. I honestly don't really give a damn. I feel really shitty today and I didn't appreciate going to some high class resturant to act like a princess or something. Whatever. I think that's just stupid.

My mom paid me back today though, so I have a shitload of money for the Holidays. But I still don't have my birthday money from my family yet, so this is going good for Lynn.

Last night was halloween (no shit) and it was a really good night for me. I went to Molly's house and we went trick-0r-treating. We went to this one house and got wicked sketched out by these two old lesbians who told us to come in and take pictures with them. We were like *RUNS TO THE CONSERVATIVE RUPUBLICAN HOUSE, AT LEAST THEY WON'T BE CREEPY LESBIANS* That's a first and last for Lynn running toward that kind of a house. Believe me.

So I'm talking to Molly via text and I feel bad that I didn't go to the party to see Doug and her. But at the same time I'm really happy I can sit here, listen to the starting line, cry, and drink iced tea instead.

Does that make me weird?

Her family stood by trying hard not to cry
With patience and virtue kept strong through the night, oh.
She never fell to her knees, her searching was over, over.
Hold on to the light that guides you
Hold on to the air that cools you
Hold on, hold on to me
Hold on to the light that guides you
Hold on to the air that cools you
Hold on, hold on to me

Thinking of you.

Hey everyone!



My week got better than worse now its just okay. As far as better went; I went to Bourne/Buzzard's Bay for my aunt's funeral and wake. I had no idea how large my family was. I met around a hundred people who were all related to me. It gave me a sense of security and loyalty. I also stayed in a cheesy motel with my mom overnight which wasn't bad. I gave her an all expense-paid trip into my mind and I feel like we have a stronger bond now.



As far as bad went I've been thinking about Joany a LOT lately. I miss her insanely because I really feel like SHS is nothing without her. Its a lot lonelier and I feel less safe without her. But on the bright side, we're selling Breast Cancer Awareness bracelets in GSA. I think its going to be an awesome sale. Helping hands is selling these tickets that are getting hung above the wall in the aud (its called the Wall of Hope) its also for breast cancer. You know something? Its amazing that even our sucky school can come together to support someone. It gives me hope.



So today was a pretty normal day in the life of Lynn...NOT! So first of all, it was the 27th of October; a horrid day for Lynneh. So crappy day was crappy. I then proceeded to go to the Halloween party for GSA! It was at Melrose High and sadly, only two of the Saugus GSA students went (Me and Nicole) and two adults (Branwein and Mikey). I looked amazing if I say so myself ;). So most of the time I chilled with Rosanna, Sean, Nicole, and Nora. They are the shit. Sean was probably the funniest person I've ever met xDDDD. He was wearing gold undies over the top of his jeans and a golden cape. Right now I'm jamming out to Katy Perry and putting off Agola's homework.

Luck Be A Lady

So yes.
I'm Lynn.

Thanks for the intro.

I'm a sophmore at a public school
I'm probably more opinated than anybody else I know
I support gays/lesbians/bi's/trans. ANYTHING REALLY
I'm in Gay-Straight-Alliance, chorus, and animoo club
I clean carpets for my job.

I love music. All kinds.
Especially showtunes/really oldies/country.

I love Doug
I love Molly
They're my life :)

I also love kids.
I hope to be a nurse or a nurse practioner.
Maybe even a lawyer?

So that's me in a nutshell..
Now for tonight's blog.

So, my week has SUCKED.
I'm not even kidding.

So, Monday I wake up and feel like crap. I roll over and go to sleep, wake up and go to the doctors.
Whatever.
So Monday night I find out that my Aunt died. Which fucking sucks.
So I stayed home from school today and sprained my ankle. But it feels worse than a sprain.

I have to go to the doctor's tomorrow.

I'm excited for Thursday however, because in GSA, we're having elections for treasurer and I'm pretty sure I dominate.

I have to go now though, its getting late and I still have an English paper to do!